Our latest Fascination...

So...we all know that the other day Hailey decided to pee into a cereal bowl. Well yesterday, as I'm sitting on the couch, staring at the ceiling and playing with my beautiful golden locks (lol), I hear the tinkling of something being poured into a hallow tin can. I gasp for air as I'm jumping up off the couch and to my surprise, I find Hailey holding a Fresca can between her legs and aiming for the hole with her filtered capri sun, her pee.

I'm flabbergasted. What is it about "not" peeing in the toilet that she enjoys so much? She's done so good with getting the bathroom, wiping, flushing and washing. So why on earth is she peeing in random weird places?

Yesterday as she was getting into the bath tub, she decided it would be a clever idea to stand on the ledge and squat so that she could pee into the tub. This morning, instead of sitting on the toilet seat as she usually does, she decided to STAND on the toilet seat and aim for the hole. WHAT ON EARTH?! To top off all of these random pee stories, she'll tell me she has to go pee, run to the bathroom, lock the door, get butt naked and rummage through my makeup and apply each and every color of eye shadow to her face. Now, this isn't like she hides in there and I'm just not paying attention. She does this with speed and agility. It plays out like this.

Hailey "Mom, I go potty...okay?"
Me "Okay baby...I'll come with you."
Hailey "NO MOM...I'm going potty"

Then she sprints to the bathroom like a bunny being chased by a rotweiler as I frantically run into walls trying to keep up with her, then SLAM! (duh dun nah) She locks the door, and by the time I get to "1...2..." She's unlocked it and has managed to cover her face in all the colors of the rainbow.

Oh, how swift our children are.

Oh, and in case you were wonder...yes, she tried to drink the Fresca.

My Privacy and Well Being...

The other day my older sister comes over and tells me about how excited our Mother is to have read her blog. Apparently our mother enjoys reading about our lives. Then upon going to my Mothers house a few days later, she asks the dreadful words..."Rachel, Do you have a blog, because I would love to read it."

"NO....NO NO NO NO......NOOOOOOO!"

Actually, those weren't the words that came out of my mouth, the real words were...

"Yes, but I don't write in it that often."

"I would like to compile some of all your kids writings to send to Grandma."

"NOOOOOOO....DOUBLE NO NO NO NO NON O NO NONO!"

Again, those were not the words...

"Okay, I'll send you the link"

Ah, maybe it can't be that bad...I'll just filter through any negative thoughts I may have posted out of anger. I filtered, but it turns out I didn't have to delete anything. Nice, I've discovered through blog filtration that I am a good person.

Now I felt challenged. G's blog (initials are her idea) is an AMAZING blog. Very detailed, structured, and generally mind consuming. This morning I read it for the first time and could not stop reading. It was great, my sister is deep minded. Impressive at the least.

Now I am jealous of her writings...how am I to compete with such verbal perfection? Such amazing daily adventures? I shall aspire to write like her.

This reminds me of a time that I was upset with G for stealing my friends. How SHALLOW of her! Right? So I confronted her, I said

"G, I don't like you stealing my friends, I don't want you talking to them anymore."
G- "I'm not stealing your friends, they just like me better"
Me- "NO THEY DONT, you're stealing them!"

See, I was jealous that my sister had a better personality than mine. Everyone thought she was sweet, and mature, and smart, and funny, and whatever! I was jealous, and she was stealing my friends so she was EVIL in my book. My confrontation of her friend stealing tactics turned into a heart felt dancing of words which resulted in her knowing that I was jealous of her personality, and me knowing that she was jealous of my ability to attract people to our home.

My point being...She has one upped me again! She's sweet, mature, smart, funny and now, she's verbally gifted!

Where was I going with this? Oh yes, that's right. Upon discovering that our Mother enjoys stalking us via blog entries I decided that I would abandon my blog and never again write in the world of cyber communications. Then, I read G's blog...CRAP! I'm inspired and now have the urge to write my every thought and experience of my life into a blog.

Today I have decided that it's okay if my mom knows who I am. I mean for goodness sakes...we all need entertainment.

Potty Training Blunders...

My daughter, Hailey, has been potty trained for almost a year now. She's a fast learner, and I'm a proud mother.

This morning, I set her in front of the TV to watch the Bee Movie...the fact that the tv is 1,000 times larger than her, making the bees 100 times larger than her, is very fascinating for a two and a half year old. Anyways, it distracts her just enough for me to enjoy my coffee and check my email before having to shut off the tv and throw a screaming, angry two year old into the shower against her will.

Back on track...This morning I had given Hailey a bowl of cheerio's and milk to eat while watching the Bee Movie. As I'm sitting down checking my email (waiting for my finals grades) I hear a trickling of water.

"NO!"

"What Mom?!"

"NO!"

"Sowwy Mommy!"

"Are you Peeing in the bowl child?!"

"Yes..."

Then there is a pause...What do I say? I was trying not to laugh...It reminded me of a time that my Dad had taken me to work with him and I had to pee very badly. There was no bathroom near by. He handed me a milk carton, and I peed...all over my legs!

So Hailey peed in a bowl. I made her clean it out herself, just as a lesson learned...or not. When she finished she brought the bowl back to me....

"I'm hungry mommy"

Milking the system...

Oh my goodness! Are you serious!?

So last night I'm sitting at my dining room table with my babies daddy. We're filling out divorce papers, trying to come to an agreement on custody and stipulations so that we don't have to take the case to court.

We get to the child support sheet. The worksheet says he's required to pay me $533 per month. Woah! That would be nice, considering he hasn't given me a PENNY since the day she was born! But I know he's a slacker, and couldn't afford $533 a month if his life depended on it. Mainly because after being with the BOY for 7 years, I know he doesn't know how to handle money any better than a 4 year old.

So he says to me. "Put down that we have an agreement and the courts don't need to handle it" So I laughed! and said "If we put that down, they're just going to make you pay the $533" so he yells at me! "Don't be selfish Rachel, you know I can't afford that!" So I say "Maybe if you got off your ass and found a better job you COULD" and he says "Rachel, I'm not working" and then....

Let me say this in it's own paragraph. He says to me...

"I'm laid off and living off unemployment and section 8"

WTF?! My babies daddy gets section 8!?

Here I am. A 25 year old single mother working multiple jobs, with OUT benefits, to keep my head above ground. The state tells me I don't even qualify for benefits, because I have the "potential" to make too much money...and here's my ex.

28 years old. Lazy. Unmotivated. Shallow. Selfish. Criminal convictions and a drug problem...and the state is paying for his housing?!?!

This only backs up my idea that I so LOUDLY and tactlessly suggested that afternoon in the Department of Human Services lobby the other day when they told me I was capable of making too much money to receive benefits. See...this is how it played out.

Me "I'm having trouble getting by right now and my daughter needs health and daycare so that I can work to make more money".

Helper "I'm sorry, your employment history shows that you are capable of making more than our limits"

Me "but my recent pay stubs put me below it"

Helper "Sorry, there's nothing I can do"

Me (while pointing to the people waiting in the lobby) "Maybe if you drug tested half of these tweaker mothers and dead beat dads sitting in here then we WOULDN'T have this problem! Would we?!"


So maybe my temper got the best of me....but COME ON!! I only need the assistance temporarily...and I think that after paying taxes since I was 16 to supply the freaking program, that maybe I could use it until I got back on my feet. But NOOOOO! It's people who have sat on their asses all their lives that qualify.


O-M-G! Whatever...I'll be fine. I'll just put in the divorce paper that my babies daddy has to take a drug test at any time I require it. :-P

Earth, Wind, Fire, Water!!! LOL

Loving an enemy.

Last night I dreamt that a man whom I don't appreciate all that well, was learning to fly. I was teaching him. He was floundering all over the ground like an idiot, and didn't under stand when I told him he had to run as fast as he could, then jump into the air and spread his wings. So I yelled at him...I said, "what don't you understand!?"

Then suddenly I floated backwards and realized that his wings were broken. Feathers were missing, muscles were weak. I began to feel sorry for this man that I never thought I would feel sorry for. He's caused so much pain to those that I love and cherish.

So WHY did I feel bad?!

I thought for a moment then said to myself... "if I were to give him my wings, he could fly."

As I helped him up off the ground he was fighting with, I thought to myself... "If I give him my wings I will never be able to fly again...what if I fall? I'll hit the ground, and I'll hit it hard"

I gave him my wings and with peace and joy in his face, he flew away.

Why did I have a dream where I was helping a man whom I did not like? I then realized that this dream was God's way of bringing clarity to a scripture I had read before bed that night.


Matthew 5;7 - "Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy"